PiperIndeed

From IMiA

Phillip will find Juliana in her small, cozy 'office', which is really a conversion of what was once the closet in what was once the Lady's BedChamber, which is now a guest room since they so unfashionably share a bedchamber. An old maid door opens into it from the hall. The walls are all done in a soft blue fabric, which makes the blue of Juliana's eyes seem even richer. The 'office' doesn't have a desk. It has mahogany filing cabinets acting as endtables on each side of a large black leather, overstuffed chair.

The chair's back is to the door, and Juliana is staring out the window the was so expensive to put it, over the darkening back gardens, past the wall, into nowhere. Across from her is the empty loveseat that matches the chair she's in. Either seat is vulnerable to attack from the door or the window. (I just imagine this is the kind of thing Juliana would never consider in arranging furniture, because for her it is about the view.) There is just enough room for the bookshelves lining the walls on her left and right, and to get around the furniture.

The bookshelves hold only ten books, the rest are filled with trinkets from their days in shadow, most of them gifts or 'unique' items she picked up, along with those pictures that haven't degraded yet. Right now they're fluttering with the light from twenty-some small candles scattered randomly on the shelves. These are the only light in the room, but they seem to do in the small space.

Juliana is so caught up in her thoughts she doesn't react at all when he opens the door.

"Evening, love."

She jerks around to look at him, and then takes a deep breath and pushes on her stomach. "Hello, sneaky," she says. She leans over to pick up the notes that have fallen out of her lap. She sits back up, and says, "Please, come sit down. Did you drink enough for me to take advantage of you?"

Phillip crosses the room and sits. With a smile, he says, "That depends upon the context of your question."

Juliana pouts. "If that's your answer, you didn't drink enough." She rearranges herself, putting the notes up on top of the filing cabinet to her left, and pulling her legs up under her. She's changed into her lounging clothes, and her hair is down now - brushed out but still crinkly from her earlier braids.

"I just..." she begins, and then changes her mind. "I'm going riding with Varien next week. I may poke him to see what comes out. Do we have enough money for me to buy a horse?"

Phillip arches an eyebrow. "San Oceal. Charming." Then, "If it will make you happy, you can buy a horse."

"Horses always make me happy. It will depend, I think, on if one is worth buying or not. I will try not to buy one just to get it away from him," Juliana smiles, all truth there. She's spent more money to save lesser creatures.

"I was thinking earlier, why don't we combine our resources? I realize we never did it... before, and for very good reasons, and all, but I would feel bad if my men were tripping up yours, and I would feel worse if your men... well, they are a bit more dangerous than mine, I'd bet," Juliana suggests. She tilts her head, watching him. She is stepping a bit carefully.

"To what end?"

"Well, things that you..." Juliana sighs. Now she has to say it out loud. Her voice is tight. "The things that you can tell me about. The things that are your secrets and not someone else's. This girl, for example, unless there is something I'm missing there. The last thing I need is one of my men getting mistaken for someone else by one of your men, or vice-versa."

"I set Carl Grackle on her trail," Phillip says. "He likes to work alone."

Juliana's eyebrows go right up. "The Grackle? The Grackle to hunt down a girl? He does that? Won't he...well, no, he's may need to. That's good," she says, and nods.

"I didn't know you worked with him," Juliana adds rather quietly.

"I do not," Phillip answers. "Yet he is uniquely qualified to locate and protect the girl and so I have hired him to do so."

Juliana nods then, slowly. "Well, that was good of you. I mean, well done."

She moves along again. She picks up a letter and glances over it again. "Melinda - you probably don't remember her, but she helped alter my wedding dress, and told my mother to hush before she unduly stressed the future Duchess - worlds but I love her - nonetheless, she shares a shop in Baylesport now. She mentioned in her note here that Count Diaz sailed back in the other day, which means he should very well be in town, by now. I'd like to add him to the guest list, if he's not on your list of those we object to? He always had plenty of money and I believe I can persuade him out a good bag or two."

"Oisenmouth. Quaint," Phillip mutters. Then, "He could be good for a contribution and it would be questionable to refrain from inviting him. His loyalty to his master should not be an issue given that all the Royals have been invited."

Juliana smiles and shifts, catlike. "You don't like him. Besides his propensity for redheads, whyever not?"

"One might think that would be enough," Phillip replies. Then, "Oisenmouth and I know each other of old and my memory is very long."

Juliana's eyebrows go up, but the smile stays. "Was it a woman?"

"Among other issues," Phillip says.

"Hm," she grins. "Is there nothing I can do to drag the story from you? Will you leave me to wonder?"

"I'm surprised it isn't covered in the damn book," Phillip growls. "Or a sequel. The man has no notion of discretion."

Juliana laughs, and then looks contrite. "Oh, darling, he did at least change names, if nothing else. Now I must read them again, for it's been many many years, and see if I can find you. It's my fault, you know. I was his paper girl. He might have had to go to Begma to get them published, if it weren't for scheming me," she confesses.

"Yes," Phillip says."There is also his relationship with you."

Juliana scowls. "What have you, spies everywhere?"

"As I said, the man is indescrete."

"Not that indiscrete, darling," she says, but there is an edge to the adoration. "And you can hardly hold that against him darling, it was well before your time."

"I never claimed it was rational."

She looks for all the world like she's going to talk to him until he becomes rational, but then she goes still, and the smile returns. "You're jealous. You're actually jealous." Juliana is slightly amazed.

"Is that so surprising?" Phillip sighs. "You wanted disclosure. There it is."

"Yes it's surprising!" Juliana declares shrilly before she calms herself down. She takes a deep breath. "You've never so much as blinked. I didn't know you cared. Not that you have anything to be jealous of."

"If you didn't know I cared, you haven't been paying bloody attention," Phillip says and begins walking toward the door.

Juliana reaches out and grabs for his hand. "Phil, wait, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I didn't. Please."

Phillip stops. Sighs. "Eric is one thing. But Oisenmouth. Oisenmouth is unworthy of you."

"Please come sit down," she pleads.

Phillip sits.

"I *am* sorry. And I am surprised. If you're to be angry at me for it, so be it, but you've never so much as growled at anyone. I know you love me, but the two don't always go hand in hand, and if I wasn't to know from your actions, how was I to know?" she asks quietly. He can tell from the way she's moved herself now that if he tries to leave she's going to try to get in his way, not that he can't get around that.

"My actions should long ago have made clear my feelings for you," Phillips says. "No, I do not growl. I did not know it was required of me."

"You could growl, occassionally. And I can't point to one of your actions and call it possessive or jealous," she notes.

"Is that too a requirement now?' Phillip asks. "I would think you would not want that. Certainly no one who I might be jealous of would want such a thing."

Juliana chews on her bottom lip and actually looks at a loss for words a moment. She looks at the ground. "You're right, of course," she says, sounding a little shaky. "I'm not trying to give you a list of requirements. I have no intention of playing the nagging wife. If what I've asked is making you chafe this much then I'm uncomfortable asking for it. I'd rather be... uninformed and have you... be you," she finishes weakly.

"What is it you want? I demonstrate my love for you in word and deed. That I do not openly display the negative aspects of my love for you should not be a problem."

Juliana sighs and looks sad. "It's not. But don't be angry at me for being surprised that you are jealous when you've never acted jealous, Phillip!"

And suddenly, she's angry. "You really want to know what I want? I want you to love me so much you *need* me. I want to be the most important thing in your life. *I* want to be what you live and die for. I want you not to give up on *me*," her voice cracks, and tears finally start to threaten, though she's fighting them. She presses her hand harder against her stomach. "I want to know you well enough to know you're jealous, and not non-chalant. Even when it's irrational. But I don't, and *that* is what this is really about. I asked to get let in, and you said I'd be let in, and here I sit, waiting. And from what I can tell, you are completely put off by the idea of letting me in."

"You really don't know me at all," Phillip says with a sad shake of his head. "You question your importance to me? You think I have ever given up on you? After everything we have been through? After everything I have done?" He shakes his head again. "Then there is nothing more i can do. I can tell you every bloody secret that is mine to tell and it will change nothing. Despite everything, you will still not know me."

"Phillip, please stop taking everything I say and turning it around on me. Listen to me. Are we trying to have a baby, or are we not? Because I've been trying and it's proven that I *can* get pregnant - so why have I not gotten pregnant for nine years? I'm horrible at chosing my wording when I'm upset. That's what I meant by not giving up on me. Can you honestly tell me you think I can give you a son?"

Phillip stops. He looks into Juliana's eyes. "Despite history and despite pressure, I have not given up hope." There is something in his eyes then that Juliana may not have seen since Aidran-almost a vulnerability. "But if the cost of an heir is your life, it is too high. "

"There is no way of knowing how it will go, and you know that. I hope you haven't made that decision without me," she whispers.

"No."

She nods, but she looks rather crestfallen, even getting the answer she wanted. "Then I have no explanation either, for why nine years have gone with nothing. But I'll take the hope I can find, even if it's just a dream."

Juliana moves over to sit next to him. She takes his hand and holds it tight between her own. "I want you to trust me too. I know I have this awful past full of things a sane person would rather ignore, and I know..." she says, her tears suddenly falling, "I know I spent two hundred years refusing to be a good wife. But I've changed, Phillip, and you're it for me. I want you to *know* that you're it for me."

Phillip slowly reaches out to wipe her tears away.

She just keeps searching his face for some clue she's missing. "Phil, don't do that. Say something," she whispers.

He smiles. "I love you."

She smiles back at him. "I'll take that."

Juliana shifts to wrap her arms around him and lean on him. She gives him time to move until he's comfortable. "What in the world were we talking about before all this started?"

"San Oceal."

"Little Varien. I am like a cat with a mouse. I will try not to frighten him to death," she promises. "But perhaps I don't give him enough credit."

"He should not be trusted."

"Well, I do think I figured that out already. The question is why. What is his problem with me?" she asks, knowing Phillip doesn't likely know any more than she does. "And whyever was he playing drunk and sneaking around at the Dumas party? What is his game?"

"I can not be certain about the former," Phillip replies. "As to the latter, he was breaking into our home."

Juliana sits up, shocked. "What? He left the party to break in here? But he didn't... you... oh," she says, as she quickly begins connecting the string of events. "Do you know what he was after? Does he know you know?"

"I suspect he was after information. I should have killed him," Phillip says with no hint of emotion. "Yet he is young so I have given him his life that he might mature. This one act of genoristy is all he will receive. If there is another transgression, I will deal with him. He knows that i am aware of his actions. The choice is his. It is his life to lose."

"Was this before I saw him at the House of Veils, or after, do you think?" Juliana asks. She certainly doesn't disagree with Phillip.

"Before," Phillip states. "The sequence of events as I have reconstructed it is as follows: San Oceal feigns drunkeness at the Dumas party and is shown to a room. He slips out and breaks into our home while we are at the party. You discover him absent and later leave for Southside. I become aware of the intrusion and return home. He returns to the Dumas home to discover that his absence has been noticed. He then flees to Southside, presumably to establish an alibi and an explanation for his actions, and discovers that there had been a fire at the House of Flowers. I spend the night altering my security measures and tracking him. I left him a message indicating that i was aware of his actions and that he should not attempt any other foolishness. The rest you know."

"Breaking in for information..." Juliana ponders. "Do you suppose he found anything?"

"It is unlikely. He had little time and there is litte he could find."

Juliana nods slowly, thinking all this through. "I'll be careful, I promise. I'll even take the guards, but I do think you've given me all the more reason to go. Know thy enemy, love."

"Indeed. I will not attempt to talk you out of it."

Juliana smiles against him. "You're the most clever man I've ever met."

"So is there anything I can help you with? I mean, don't make something up for me, but if you have something I'd be suited to getting done... that wouldn't... compromise your..." her hand flutters helplessly against his chest, "whatever... you know?" Juliana says, since she doesn't.

"I will give it some thought," Phillip assures her.

"And you will think about ways our people can work together?" she asks.

"When possible," he agrees.

"Very well," Juliana sighs, and squeezes. "I am sorry I made you upset," she adds.

"My fault entirely."

She pushes herself up and looks at him, wearing a wry little smile. "Let us be equals, my lord. I'll take half the fault, if you'll but give me the responsibility."

He sighs, then smiles. "Very well."

Juliana smiles back at him. "Why don't you have some more to drink?"

-- Main.LizTrumitch - 21 Dec 2004